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"This is the city, Los Angeles California
Posted On 09/25/2008 18:31:12

This is this city!

Los Angeles is a sprawling megalopolis of cement and palm trees that houses any thing one might imagine, even serenity. Though, it is rare.

Generally, L.A. is a bustling furnace of a city whose crosswalks are crowded with people of questionable nationality, religion, sexual orientation, sincerity and occupation, and ‘they’ have the Right of Way!

Pedestrians of our city are thoughtless, self serving, unthinking, uncaring, abusers of our laws. And the whole world knows it!

The world knows that in Las Angeles, California pedestrians have the Right of Way.

People fly in from all over the world to experience the feeling of power and exhilaration of stepping out into the path of my vehicle. Traveling groups of people from foreign countries take pictures of each other stepping out into the path of my car. Because, no matter what the circumstances are, I must stop and let them pass and they know it. Pedestrians stop traffic, in L.A., as a sport.

I live in Hollywood, California only a few blocks from city center. I would like to tell you that Hollywood is nothing like they show on TV, but, I cannot. Hollywood is everything you’ve heard it is and more. You see, Hollywood is a city of transients. Every day thousands of young people arrive, rent an apartment, take a stab or maybe even a run at showbiz, fail to make a mark, then, get back in a car and drive back to Kansas.

It is these plods I will speak of! The people of Hollywood proper cannot be generalized. Everywhere one looks one sees yet another example of behavior and peoples the likes of which one could not have imagined a moment before. I live in a grand carnival! I live in Hollywood, California. The place that everyone wants to see or be seen in.

My town gets closed down regularly to accommodate some parade or demonstration. The Chinese New Year parade takes place, not in China Town but, Hollywood! The streets of my city are blocked, for one cause or another, most every day.

But, if you like action, Hollywood is the place. The possibilities are endless. Think deep into your psyche and of the most private lust you hide and, in Hollywood there are support groups for just that sort of behavior. There are bars where people with your particular weirdness congregate. If, for instance, you like to wear carrots in your butt you would find people of like mind at a place called The Carrot Club on Wilcox. If your thing is dancing in worm oatmeal you would feel at home at La Poubell on Franklin Ave.

So needless to say driving in L.A. is challenging. I have no need of video gaming! I drive in Hollywood! The Big Game is where your own physical being is at stake. There are no rules that are followed. For instance, U turns are more than common because this dink is new to the city and is lost. Left turns are everywhere! It is kayos. Stay home.

The benefit of living in a city is that services are close at hand. My dry cleaner is a half a block from my home. The same for my mechanic and it is wonderful to be able to whip the convertible in there for little adjustments and servicing. They all know my name. I have a shoe repair close by and several restaurants, my tailor is within walking distance.

But for the most part I ride my motorcycle. It makes sense in the city and I enjoy cruising! And today I have business at the beach.

And I am

Kip Addotta

Mre at http://www.kipaddotta.com

Tags: Kip AddottaLos Angeles


How to address women!
Posted On 09/22/2008 14:42:41

I have noticed that people seem to have no idea of how to refer to or talk to women, if they do not know the woman's name.

Let me offer a few guidelines.

When addressing a female it is not necessary to mention her station, age, marital status or looks. All of these can get you into trouble. If you say, "Hey lady" she might think that you are objectifying her. If a man says, "Listen girl" she could think that you are inferring that she has no experience. If you say, "Madam" what she hears is old.

There is one term that will never get you into trouble. This magical term is "Miss." Women will gladly answer to "Miss" no matter what their marital status, age or looks are. You can address a women of ninety as "Miss" and she will not only accept it, she will think that you are kind, intelligent and experienced. Mrs. Jones may be happily married but when she is not with her husband she will delight in being called "Miss." "Miss" is the secret word that never fails to get you points.

Also, "You look good in that outfit" will be taken as "You look good in that outfit but not in the other outfits you wear. The correct way to say it is, "You make that outfit look great!" "You look good" is better than, "You look good, today", as opposed to some other day.

Furthermore, women and men do not want to hear who they look like even if the person, you think they look like, is rich, young and beautiful! If you insist on being one of these idiots who go around telling people who they look like, here is how to do it.

"You look like Nicole Kidman" will get you into trouble. Believe it or not, the women you are addressing may not have a high opinion of Nicole Kidman, "Nicole Kidman looks like you" will be accepted! "You look like Brad Pitt" is wrong! "Brad Pitt reminds me of you" will be tolerated.

If you want to avoid trouble all together, it is wise to never infer that one person looks like someone else. You see, we all want to believe that we look like ourselves which is always closer to the truth! Think about it. When have you felt good about someone telling you that you look like someone else?

And I am

Kip Addotta

Tags: Women And How You Refer To Them


Your Call Is Important To Us
Posted On 09/17/2008 21:33:28

I do not feel like I'm alone when I think that if my call were so important someone would run to the phone and pick it up. If you work for a company that uses this phrase to answer their incoming calls you might want to let them know that they're not fooling anyone. Even the dullest among us know that our calls are not important to you. Let your boss know that all the fake courtesy we have to listen to when we call in is simply a transparent way of fending us off until your highly understaffed company can get to our 'Very Important" call.

We wait patiently while some friendly sounding huckster reads off a bunch of choices that are meant to stiff arm us into going to your web site to peruse through a list of what you call "commonly" asked questions. And we know that none of these pre-invented questions will have anything to do with what we are calling about.

We wait patiently while your hired mouthpiece goes through a long list of options that will relieve you from picking up the phone. We wait because we know that at the end of your endless list of choices they will get to the last one which we all know is the choice we are all after. You guessed it! We want to talk to someone. Anyone! Have the janitor pick up the damn phone. Then he or she can tell us what in hell you are doing while we are making a call that is "important to you."

Yes, we all know that you and your company and your "Smiling Viper" employees are not the least bit interested in doing the job that we pay them for.

This being said, I would like to hear your comments. Give me a call and explain why no one who works for your company has the time to pick up the God Damn Phone!
See you in bankruptcy court!

And I am,

 

Kip Addotta

 

More at: http://www.kipaddotta.com/

 

Tags: On Hold Waiting For A Responce Waiting For A Person To Pick Up The Phone




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